Dirty Jokes

What do you call a truck loaded with vibrators?
Toys for twats.

What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

What do women and condoms have in common?
They both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

What do you call two skunks that are 69ing?
Odor eaters

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?

Why do men name their penis?
They like to be on a first name basis with the one making most of
their decisions.

What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?

What kind of bees give milk?
Boo bees

What do gay men refer to hemorrhoids as?
Speed bumps

What is the difference between pussy and parsley?
No one eats parsley.

What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?
They both like a tight seal.

What does Popeye do to keep his favorite tool from rusting?
Sticks it in Olive Oyl.

Why do only 30% of men get into Heaven?
If it were more, it would be Hell.

What has three teeth and sixty feet?
The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.

What is the new O.J. website address?
slash slash backslash escape

What did the lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog?
They're right! We do taste like chicken!

What did the banana say to the vibrator?
What are YOU shaking for? She is going to eat me!

Why do girls rub their eyes in the morning?
They have no balls to scratch

Why do men like big tits and tight pussy?
Because they've got big mouths and little dicks.

What is the difference between ooooooh and aaaaaaah?
About three inches.

How do you make a hormone?
Don't pay her.

What do you call a gay dinosaur?

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One..Men will screw anything

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play
with the other is used to carry groceries.

Do you know what a Jewish dilemma is?
Free ham.

What's the definition of Trust?
Two cannibals giving each other a blow job.

What's the difference between a paycheck and a penis?
You don't have to beg your girlfriend to blow your paycheck.

Why don't women have any brains?
Because they don't have penises to keep them in.

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